Blond Jokes
by Songstone
Summary: You've heard the dumb blond jokes before, and these aren't anything new. The only difference here is that the 'dumb blond' is everyone's favorite suicide bomber. -SasoDei in the first chapter, and will mostly be just Dei-abuse...in a loving way, of course
1. The Puzzle

**Blond Jokes**

**A story by Songstone**

**Songstone: I've been wanting to do something like this for a while...8D;;**

**Chapter 1: The Puzzle**

Sasori glanced up from the book he had been reading and looked towards his ringing cell phone as it vibrated against the wooden desk by his bed. It was nearly ten o' clock at night, so he wasn't particularly happy about receiving phone calls when he was supposed to be relaxing after a long day's work.

Grudgingly, he set his book aside and grabbed up his phone. The caller ID showed the name of his boyfriend, Deidara; well, this wasn't too bad. If he was going to be interrupted by anyone, Sasori preferred that it be Deidara since the blond was just about the only person whose company he could tolerate for longer than an hour.

"Hello?" Sasori asked as he answered the call. He took his glasses off and lay them over his book so that he could go back to reading later.

"Sasori!" Deidara's voice exclaimed from the other end of the phone. "Hey, I need your help. Can you please come over here and help me? I've got this killer jigsaw puzzle and I can't figure out how to get it started, yeah."

The redhead was speechless for a moment, quite taken aback by Deidara's strange request. "Er...a jigsaw puzzle?" He asked, just to be sure.

"Yeah. It's _super_ hard, Sasori." Deidara confirmed.

"Well..." Sasori rubbed the back of his neck. "What's it supposed to be when it's finished?" He questioned.

"Well, according to the box, it's supposed to be a tiger, yeah." The blond sighed.

"Ah..." Sasori knew that it would probably be a waste of time, but he sighed and agreed to go over and help Deidara anyway. After he had hung up with his lover, he pulled on a pair of pants and a shirt, slipped on some sandals and grabbed his keys before heading out the front door.

It was a quick drive to Deidara's apartment, and just a few seconds after Sasori had knocked on Deidara's door, the blond answered and greeted him sweetly before waving for the redhead to follow him inside.

"It's on the table in the kitchen, yeah." Deidara said as he pulled Sasori by the hand towards the mentioned room. "See?"

Sasori silently observed the scattered peices for a moment, then reached for the box that Deidara had left on the counter nearby. "Hn..." He muttered to himself as he studied the cover. He put the box back down, then turned to his lover, who was standing besides the table, anxiously grabbing up different pieces and trying to fit them together.

"Deidara? First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger." Deidara lifted his head, confused, and Sasori grabbed one of the blond's hands and gently held it in his own. "Secondly, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then..." He sighed. "...we'll put all these Frosted Flakes back into the box."

**Songstone: -shot dead- xDD;; OMG, I'm so sorry. XD But I honestly couldn't help myself! Deidara makes a cute retard! Can you blame me!? -brick'd- Anyway...If I have any luck with my writing, I could have a couple more short chapters like this up soon. XD As always, let me know what you think please! 8D**


	2. At the doctor's

**Blond Jokes**

**A story by Songstone**

**Songstone: Hurray, super short second chapter! 8D -shot again-**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**

**Chapter 2: At the doctor's**

"Hello, uhm..." Kakuzu consulted his clipboard for his patient's name. "Deidara. What seems to be the problem here today?" The doctor took a seat in front of the blond, who was seated on the cushioned platform.

"Oh, doctor, you've got to help me." The blond all but wailed when Kakuzu had asked what was the matter. "I hurt _everywhere_, yeah!"

"Huh? What do you mean?" Kakuzu asked, quirking a brow at the blond's exclamation.

"I hurt! Everywhere." Deidara clarified. When Kakuzu just tilted his head to one side slightly, the blond picked up one hand and, with one finger, touched his right knee. Instantly, he let out a sharp yelp of pain that made even Kakuzu jump in surprise.

"That hurt you?" The brunette asked in surprise.

Deidara nodded his head. "Everywhere!" He repeated. He touched his left cheek and whimpered. "Ow, that hurts too, yeah!" He did the same thing to his right earlobe and had the same painful reaction. "See?" He demanded.

Kakuzu's green eyes were widened in slight alarm as he watched the display. It took only a moment as Kakuzu eyed his patient closely, but he finally nodded once to himself, positively. The doctor sighed and placed his clipboard away on the side of the counter before looking towards the distressed man intently. "Deidara?" He questioned. "Are you, by any chance, a natural blond?"

Deidara quirked an eyebrow and tilted his head to one side. "Yes, I am." He said with a small nod.

"Ah, I thought so." Kakuzu sighed again. "You see, you have a broken finger."

**Songstone: Hurray for Doctor!Kakuzu and Retard!Deidara! xDD Gotta love that combination. As always, I hope that you liked it. Please let me know if you want another chapter; I'm having fun writing these. 8D**


	3. First Meeting

**Blond Jokes**

**A story by Songstone**

**Songstone: Wewt. I still remembered this mini series. xD;;**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto  
**

**Chapter 3: First Meeting**

"Hey, Sasori?" Deidara's sleepy voice drifted up to the redhead as they lay side by side in bed.

"Hn?" The redhead questioned. He slipped his arm over Deidara's waist now that he knew his lover was still awake and absently began to run his fingers over the smooth skin of the blond's belly.

Deidara shivered into the touch, but peeked over his shoulder at Sasori. "Do you remember when we first met, yeah?"

Sasori paused for a moment, blinking down at Deidara's resting form before he gave a snort of amusement and a nod. "Of course I remember how we met. How could I forget?"

- - -

It was almost five years ago, now; back when Sasori was still a traveling entertainer living out of his truck.

Ventriloquism was a talent that he had always possessed, so naturally he used it to make a living. He had recently booked a show in a small town in Iwagakure; that night he had set up his act on the stage of a small bar, and soon enough he had the crowd that was gathered all laughing at his puppet's jokes.

Sasori often used a lot of dumb blond jokes in his act. It always got such a positive reaction from the audiences he preformed for, so he had always included as many as he could. However, this night was different from others.

He was right at the end of one of his dumb blond jokes, when suddenly a cry erupted from the back of the bar.

"That's _it_!"

Sasori looked up to where a young, blond, man(?) was now crawling up onto his chair, looking quite annoyed as he directed his gaze at the stage. The rest of the audience all turned to look his way as well.

"I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes, yeah." The man began, slapping his hands onto his hips. "What makes you think you can stereotype blond's that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with their worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep blond's like me from being respected at work, and in the community, and from reaching our full potential as a person, yeah. Because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against blondes, and blonde _women_ in general, and all in the name of humor!"

A perfect silence filled the bar as everyone watched the man with surprised etched onto their faces. Sasori's jaw had dropped open and he was currently trying to get himself together.

"Aah! Sir," He began, embarrassed. "I didn't mean any offense! I was only--" But the blond held up his hand, silencing the redhead before he got too far into an apology.

"You stay out of this, mister!" The man glared Sasori's way with icy blue eyes, then jabbed a finger at the redhead's marionette. "I'm talking to that little shit on your knee!"

- - -

"And then that little guy on your leg apologized and you bought me drinks, yeah." Deidara beamed, rolling over and hugging onto Sasori's waist.

Sasori sighed, then smiled and nodded down to Deidara. "It's a good thing you're pretty..." He muttered, shaking his head as he kissed his lover on the forehead.

"Aww, thanks, Sasori!"

And, with a muffled groan, Sasori shut his eyes to get some sleep.

**Songstone: ****I love this joke; I thought it was perfect for these two. XD Hopefully there will be more of these to come. I've got tons more jokes. ;D **


	4. At the dry cleaner's

**Blond Jokes**

**A story by Songstone**

**Songstone: Yay for fast update. xD; I like this one. I can SO see it actually happening. 8'D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**

**Chapter 4: At the dry cleaner's  
**

The bell chimed over the door to the dry cleaner's, signaling the arrival of another customer.

Shikamaru was new to working in this place, but so far he thought that he was doing a rather good job. And it wasn't incredibly hard, either; it had taken him a total of three minutes to figure out how everything worked.

At the moment, he was flipping through a magazine lazily as he leaned against the front desk; he had headphones over his ears, and was bobbing his head in time with the beat to his music.

He never heard the bell ring over the front door, but he looked up in surprise when a green sweater was pushed over the counter at him.

There was a blond standing on the opposite side of the counter, and he was pulling a wallet out of his pant pocket. He mouthed something, and it was then that Shikamaru remembered his headphones were still over his ears. They were blaring music so loud that he didn't make out a word that the blond had said.

Quickly yanking the headphones off, Shikamaru ran a hand over his hair, pushing it back towards his ponytail. "Come again?" He asked the blond, scratching the inside of his ear with his pinky finger.

Instead of repeating himself for Shikamaru to understand, the blond blushed a light shade of pink, then giggled as he shook his head; a long fringe bounced around the left side of his face as he did.

"No, it's just mustard this time, yeah." He insisted with a grin.

Shikamaru didn't even ask; he just took the blond's sweater and charged him the usual amount of money, repressing the shiver that worked it's way up his spine.

**Songstone: Poor Shikamaru; scarred for life, I bet. xDD Hope you enjoyed the ridiculously short chapter. ;D**


	5. Nogoodcheatingexboyfriend

**Blond Jokes**

**A story by Songstone**

**Songstone: Moar retard!Dei for you! 8D This one was fun.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**

**Chapter 5: ****No-good-cheating-ex-boyfriend**

"Deidara? Who's this?" Sasori held up an old photograph towards his lover, one brow quirked. A lazy day of spring cleaning had uncovered a lot of junk in the blond's home, but this one piece intrigued Sasori in particular.

"Huh? Let me see, yeah." Deidara said, stopping the dusting he had been doing and taking the picture from the redhead.

The picture in question showed Deidara with both of his arms looped around the neck of a young, raven haired man. The brunette had one eye wrapped up with a bandage and the other was a bright red; with those features, he looked an awful lot like Itachi; or at least a relative of his.

"Oh." Deidara hissed, eyes narrowing to slits. "That's Tobi; my no-good, cheating, ex-boyfriend, yeah." He grumbled. He took hold of the picture from the middle and then casually ripped it in half.

"Really?" Sasori asked, tilting his head. "You never told me about him." He said, mildly curious about why Deidara was having such a strong reaction. 'Cheating' ex-boyfriend, he had said...

"Oh, he was an ass, yeah. Not like you at all." Deidara smiled at Sasori as he said this, still ripping the picture into small pieces.

"...Well...what happened?" Sasori asked, unable to help the curiosity.

Frowning slightly, Deidara tossed the remaining pieces of the picture into the trash bag near his leg and sighed. "_Well_..."

- - -

Deidara had been suspisious of Tobi's loyalty for quite a while now; the man would break dates a lot more now because of 'other plans' that he had made. He seemed so distant... And Deidara couldn't be too sure, but he had a hunch that Tobi had someone else's smell on him when he came over every other night...

So, one day when the scorn from a broken date was still fresh, Deidara grabbed the gun that he had bought for self-defence and stuck it into his jacket pocket. He decided to go and drop by Tobi's house; it was lunch time, so surely the other wasn't expecting him to drop by...it was the perfect opportunity for a surprise inspection.

Letting himself in with the key Tobi had given him, Deidara quickly made his way towards the back of the apartment, where the bedroom was.

Pushing open the bedroom door, Deidara stopped and paled; he gasped, covering his mouth with one hand as he caught sight of his boyfriend--in the arms of another man.

And not just any other man; Tobi was in bed with _Zetsu_, one of Deidara's best friends.

"Oh my God!" Deidara breathed, shock obvious on his face.

"Ah! D-Deidara!" Tobi squeaked, pushing himself up onto his elbows as he heard the blond's surprised intake of breath. "B-baby...I didn't...I--I..."

In total despair, Deidara just watched, aghast, as his lover crawled out from underneath his friend; and that was when Deidara remembered the gun that he had stuffed into his pocket for precisely this occasion.

Grabbing it quickly, the blond held it up for Tobi to see. Deidara took a moment of satisfaction in the brunette's horrified expression, and then he held the weapon against the side of his own head.

"Deidara!" Tobi wailed, his one visible eye flying wide open. "Deidara, honey, please! Don't do it! Don't kill yourself!"

Already sick of hearing his voice, the blond simply narrowed his eyes and snapped; "Shut up, yeah!" And then, with tears brimming in the corners of his eyes, he looked right into his boyfriend's face. "You're next!"

- - -

"...Huh." Sasori blinked.

"But we all got it worked out in the end... They moved away together not long afterward and I haven't seen them since." Deidara shrugged, then smiled briskly. "But that's the past, yeah?"

"Yeah." Sasori agreed, working a little bit to offer Deidara a smile. "Yeah..."

All that he had to say was that now he knew that cheating on Deidara could quite possibly get him booked for homicide, so it would be wise to simply _not do it_.

...He also really hoped that Deidara no longer had that gun.

**Songstone: Deidara's logic is BRILLIANT. DO NOT QUESTION IT. xDDDDDD So? You like? Dislike? 8'D **


	6. Q & A

**Blond Jokes**

**A story by Songstone**

**New chapter. Yippee! 8D I already had this one written out for a while now, and just now remembered and decided to post it. xD**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**

**Chapter 6: Q & A  
**

"Hey. Hidan." Kakuzu said, and nudged his boyfriend in the ribs.

"What?" Hidan grunted, looking up lazily from the magazine he'd been flipping through.

Kakuzu didn't reply; he simply nodded towards the front of the coffee shop where a friend of their's, Deidara, had just stepped inside.

Hidan, once noticing whom Kakuzu was pointing out, grinned and gave a knowing nod up to the brunette. "Hey, Dei!" He called and waved, both he and Kakuzu rising to their feet to accompany the blond to the counter where they had ordered their coffee previously.

"Oh shit..." Apparently, Deidara knew what was coming since he paled visibly when he caught sight of Kakuzu and Hidan's mischievous expressions.

"Hey..." Kakuzu said casually, tapping Hidan's shoulder. "Why don't they give blondes coffee breaks?"

Hidan, without skipping a beat, smirked and responded; "Because it's such a pain to retrain them afterward."

"Yeah, real mature..." Deidara said, face flushing.

"Hey, Kakuzu?"

"Yes, Hidan?"

"Why do you take a blonde shopping with you?"

"So you can park in the handicapped spaces."

Both men sniggered quietly to themselves before they continued. They obviously practiced this sort of thing a lot, since neither of them ever missed a beat.

"Hey, Hidan? What do blondes and beer bottles have in common?"

"They're both empty from the neck up!"

"Right! Now, what's a blonde's mating call?"

"That's easy: ''I'm sooooo drunk!'--Hey, did you hear about the blonde who lost eighty-five percent of her brains?"

"Aw, her husband died?"

"Say, Kakuzu, what is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO?"

"People have _seen_ UFO's, Hidan."

"Oh, yeah, right."

"Why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency, Hidan?"

"They can't remember the freakin' number!"

"I thought it was because they couldn't find the number eleven on the phone!"

"Oi, Kakuzu, how do you drown a blond?"

"You put a mirror at the bottom of the pool."

"That or you leave a scratch and sniff at the bottom instead."

"Hidan, have you heard about the blond who fired an arrow into the air?"

"Ah, yeah. She missed."

"Do you know how do you amuse a blonde for hours, Hidan?"

"Hell yeah. Just write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper!"

"Ouch! Nice."

"How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday morning, Kakuzu?"

"Tell them a joke on Friday night!"

"Oh, oh, I got another one! What is the blonde's chronic speech impediment?"

"He can't say 'no,' Hidan!"

Both men cracked up into fits of giggles at the innuendo of that joke as well as the pun they had managed against Deidara's constant usage of the word 'yeah' when he spoke.

"Guys, you're not funny, yeah..." Deidara muttered. But his speech impediment only made the two men laugh harder.

"Hn. You two are shameless." Itachi said from behind the counter as he worked the cash register. He handed Deidara his coffee, then put his friend's money into the register.

Hidan and Kakuzu exchanged looks with one another as the blond quickly huffed and left the coffee shop. Then both sets of eyes landed on Itachi.

"Oi...Hidan...What's the difference between a brunette and the trash?" Kakuzu asked.

"At least the fuckin' trash gets taken out once a week." Hidan replied, smirking at Itachi insulted expression.

And with that, the Zombie Twins turned and went back to their table to finish their coffee, laughing amongst themselves as they did so.

**Yes, this one is just a simple collection of short dumb blonde jokes. Told by the Zombie Twins. Because they totally WOULD. xD It'll probably be difficult for me to write and post much of anything now; I have a new puppy to take care of and she takes up all of my time. xD Oh, but I love her and my other doggie so, so I don't mind.  
**

**But yes. Kakuzu and Hidan. They are asses. xDDDD Sorry, Itachi. **


	7. Blond is Contagious

**Blond Jokes**

**Chapter 7: Blond is Contagious**

"No, Deidara. Don't." Sasori was almost begging as he shook his head at his boyfriend pleadingly.

"Why not? It's not _that_ bad, yeah. And it's funny." The blond laughed, smiling brightly and patting Sasori's knee.

Itachi just blinked across at the two lovers, leaning against Kisame's side and sighing softly. "It's just a story about when you met Deidara's family. What could be so bad?"

The redhead cringed. "You have no idea..."

- - -

After their date ended late one night, Sasori dropped the blond off at his house and walked him to his front door. Feeling a little bold that night, he leaned with one hand against the wall next to the door and says; "Sweetie, why don't you give me a blowjob?"

The blond gasped. "You're crazy!"

"What? No, don't worry." Sasori quickly tried to convince him. "It'll be quick. I promise."

"No. Someone might see us, yeah. A neighbor or something..." Deidara shook his head, still refusing.

"At this time of night? No one will see, Deidara. Come on; I really need it."

"No!" Deidara hissed. "I told you no, and I mean it, yeah." He crossed his arms over his chest.

"But Deidara..." Sasori sighed, quite persistant. It was unusual for him to be so pushy, but it had been a while since they had been intimate, and he always had been an impatient person. "Just a quick one. I know you like it too."

"No!"

Getting a little irritated, Sasori said, almost desperately; "Sweetie, don't be like that...I love you, I really do. I just really need this blowjob."

At that exact moment, Deidara's younger sister, Ino, opens the front door and faces both men. She was only wearing her nightgown, and her hair was in disarray. Rubbing her eyes, she sighed and said; "Dad says 'dammit, give him the blowjob, of I'll have to blow him. But for God's sake, tell your boyfriend to take his hand off of the intercom button so that the rest of the family can get some sleep.'"

- - -

Itachi broke out into fits of laughter, and Kisame was crying because of how hard he was cracking up.

Deidara grinned and laughed quietly at the memory, then turned to look over at Sasori, who sat besides him. He found the older man red-faced, and slowly lowering his head into his hands in embarrassment.

"Come on, Sasori. It's not that bad, yeah." The blond tried to cheer him up.

"I couldn't look Ino, Jiraiya, or Tsunade in the face for months after that..." Sasori grumbled softly.

Deidara rolled his eyes and nudged his boyfriend in the ribs gently, with his elbow. "You should really learn to laugh at yourself more and quit being so up-tight, yeah."

This time, the redhead sat straight again and glared at the blond. "Shut up. You're only saying that because you weren't the idiot in the story this time."

**..::..**

**Deidara wasn't the moron this time. WHAT A TWEEST.**

xD I found this joke too hilarious to ignore. It just HAD to be put in this series; both to relieve Deidara from being the main idiot, and to show that Sasori isn't immune to Blond.

Anyway, the next chapter will be Deidara-abuse again. xD I've got tons of other jokes that I think fit him so well.  



	8. TGIF

**Blond Jokes**

**..::..**

**Felt like updating the blond jokes again. xD And we're back to having Deidara as the main moron!**

**I do not own Naruto.  
**

**..::..**

**Chapter 8: T-G-I-F  
**

Deidara was having a _great_ day.

He'd not only gotten to work on time for once, but his boss actually gave him a raise. He couldn't believe it! And what was even better was that it was Friday. Sasori usually always took him out on the weekends, and Deidara was looking forward to it.

As he was walking towards the elevator to leave work for the day, he noticed that the lift was beginning to close. He waved a hand over his head and started to run towards it. "Wait up!" He called.

He was only a few feet away, and someone was holding the door open for him. It was only when he'd made it closer and actually stepped inside of the elevator that he realized it was his boyfriend.

The redhead smiled at him and slipped an arm around his waist. "Hey, Deidara." He greeted, placing a gentle kiss on the blond's forehead.

Grinning and hugging onto Sasori's waist, Deidara decided to show his excitement over the weekend, and said in a cheery tone of voice; "T-G-I-F!"

For a moment, Sasori's smile faltered, and then he simply gave a small sigh through his nose. "S-H-I-T." He says, instead.

Deidara is taken aback by this. He gives a slow shake of the head up at his lover. "T-G-I-F." He corrects.

But, again, Sasori replies; "S-H-I-T."

"No!" Deidara said, shaking his head once more as he pulled away from their embrace. "T-G-I-F. Thank God It's Friday, yeah!"

This time, Sasori looks downright sympathetic and just shakes his head in return and lays a hand on Deidara's shoulder. "No, Deidara. S-H-I-T. Sorry Honey It's Thursday."

**..::..**

**I feel so bad for Sasori. xD How he puts up with Deidara's (really cute) incompetence, with his patience, is beyond me.**

Anyway, enjoy. 8D


	9. Formerly considered 'straight'

**Blond Jokes**

**..::..**

**Chapter 9: Formally considered 'straight'**

Physically exhausted after a long night of making love, Sasori rolled onto his side and reached down to the floor of the bedroom, feeling for his pants. Once he'd found them, he pulled a cigarette from his back pocket. Unable to find his lighter, he turned back to the young blond lying besides him.

"Do you have a light?" He asked casually.

Deidara made a small yawn and then nodded. "There might be some matches in the top drawer, yeah." He said, indicating the bedside table.

Rolling back onto his side, the redhead propped himself up with one arm and pulled open the indicated drawer, fumbling around inside of it for a little while.

While he found the matches nearly instantly, he couldn't help but notice that they were lying on top of a picture. A picture of a tall, blonde woman. She was at the beach (wearing a rather skimpy bikini), knee-deep in the ocean water.

Unable to help himself, Sasori felt a little bit worried.

Pulling the picture out of the drawer and moving to face his new lover again, he held up the frame. "Is this your..." He instantly knew that the word 'wife' just wouldn't fit. If Deidara wasn't flaming gay, then Sasori didn't want to know what was. "...sister?"

Looking over to inspect the picture, Deidara smiled and shook his head. "No, silly." He inched closer to Sasori and rested his head against his shoulder.

"Is she your mother?" Sasori continued.

"No." Deidara gave a small laugh.

Sasori looked back at the picture. Who _was_ this? He looked down at Deidara, who had begun to nibble at his ear softly. "Well, who is she?" He asked, curiosity getting the better of him.

In the end, perhaps he should have stayed blissfully ignorant. The answer Deidara gave him left him very confused and made it quite awkward to sleep with the blond for a while.

"That's me, before the operation, yeah."

**..::..**

**Again, not exactly a blond joke, but this one HAD to be squeezed into this series somewhere. xD**

**Poor Sasori. He's so confused.**

Anyway, I'll try to make the next one soon. I forgot how fun these are to write. So simple, yet so amusing. x3

Enjoy.


	10. The Bet

**Blond Jokes**

**..::..  
**

**Chapter 10: The Bet**

"I'll bet you fifty dollars that he doesn't jump, yeah!"

Itachi raised a skeptical eyebrow across the table at Deidara. The two of them had met up at Itachi's and Kisame's place after work to have some dinner and hang out. Kisame had the television tuned to the six o' clock news in the next room, and the two friends were watching the broadcast from the kitchen.

A man was shown standing atop of a large building, arms spread out wide as he wobbled a bit on the very edge of the roof. He was threatening to commit suicide by leaping off of the building, while police below tried to talk reason into him.

"I don't think it's very appropriate to be betting money on a man's life--" Itachi was interrupted.

"Come on. Just a little bet." Deidara emphasized the word 'little' by pinching his fingers together.

Giving a heavy sigh, Itachi just rolled his eyes. "Fine." He agreed.

After shaking hands to seal the bet, the two friends turned back to look at the television screen.

After a few more minutes of failed negotiation, the man took a step back, gave a loud cry, and then threw himself off of the side of the building.

"Aw man..." Deidara sighed. He reached into his pocket and fished around for a bit until he pulled out the money he owed the Uchiha and handed it over.

"Deidara, I can't take this. You're my friend." Itachi said, holding the money back out towards the blond.

Deidara stubbornly shook his head. "No, no! A bet's a bet, yeah."

Itachi felt a little awkward, but he finally just gave a sigh and shrugged his shoulders. "Look, I'll admit...I saw this broadcast on the five o' clock news earlier. I really can't take your money." He pushed the folded up bills back across the table at his friend.

Deidara again shook his head, only this time, he gave a little scoff as well. "Well, I saw it earlier too." He replied. "But I never thought he'd jump again!"

- - -

"Itachi, not meaning any offense, but why are you friends with Deidara?" Kisame asked, a few hours after Deidara had left their home. He had always wondered why the Uchiha hung out with the blond, when they obviously had little in common.

Itachi merely gave a small shrug. "He's a nice person, and he means well." He summarized, curling into the small dent of Kisame's side; a spot reserved strictly for himself.

"Besides, I can get rich off of all his lost bets."

**..::..**

**A classic. xD**

**And thus, the real reason why Itachi is friends with Deidara!**

**No, I'm kidding. Itachi really does care, but he can take advantage of Deidara's stupidity if he wanted to. .__.**


End file.
